Title: Medical Love Song
            From: Monty Python's Contractual Obligation Album
  Transcribed By: Rich Holmes (rich@suhep.bitnet)

            Inflammation of the foreskin
            Reminds me of your smile
            I've had balanital chancroids
            For quite a little while
            I gave my heart to NSU
            That lovely night in June
            I ache for you, my darling,
            And I hope you'll get well soon

            My penile warts, your herpes,
            My syphilitic sore,
            Your monilial infection
            How I miss you more and more
            Your *dobies itch my *scrum-pox
            Ah, lovely gonorrhea
            At least we both were lying
            When we said that we were clear

            My clapped-out genitalia
            Is not so bad for me
            As the complete and utter failure
            Every time I try to pee
            I'm dying from your love, my love,
            I'm your spirochetal clown
            I've left my body to science,
            But I'm afraid they've turned it down

            Gonococcal urethritis
            Streptococcal balanitis
            *Diplococcal *catholitis
            Interstitial keratitis
            Syphilitic coronitis
            And anterior *ureitis.

                                    -- Graham Chapman

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