Monty Python and The Holy Grail

Pictures | Sounds | Scripts




  • GRAILTHM.MID 4 Kb. The Theme From The Holy Grail
  • AGRAIL.WAV 11 Kb "A grrrraillll?"
  • APOLOGY.WAV 63 Kb "Every time I try to talk to someone it's 'sorry' this and 'forgive me' that and 'I'm not worthy'!"
  • ARGH.WAV 27 Kb "Aaarrrggghhh!"
  • ARMS.WAV 17 Kb "Consult the book of armaments!"
  • BEDWET.WAV 25 Kb "No chance, English bed-wetting types."
  • BISCUIT.WAV 38 Kb "All right, all right. We'll kill him first and then have tea and biscuits."
  • BITELEGS.WAV 18 Kb "I'll bite your legs off!"
  • BLEED.WAV 17 Kb "What are you going to do, bleed on me?"
  • BRITAINS.WAV 12 Kb "Who are the Britons?"
  • COCONUT.WAV 40 Kb "You've got two empty halves of coconut and you're banging them together."
  • CUTDOWN.WAV 18 Kb "Cut down a tree with a herring?"
  • DEAD.WAV 33 Kb "Bring out your dead!"
  • ECENTRIC.WAV 14 Kb "What an eccentric performance."
  • FART.WAV 32 Kb "I fart in your general direction."
  • FAVE.WAV 28 Kb "What is your favourite colour?"
  • FRENCH.WAV 58 Kb "I'm French! Why do you think I have this outrageous accent, you silly king?"
  • GAY.WAV 21 Kb "Bet you're gay." "No, I'm not."
  • GOODIDEA.WAV 30 Kb "Good idea, O Lord." "Course it's a good idea!"
  • GRENADE.WAV 83 Kb "O Lord, bless this thy hand grenade, that with it thou mayest blow thy enemies to tiny bits in thy mercy."
  • HAMSTER.WAV 57 Kb "Your mother was a hamster and your father smelled of elderberries."
  • HAPPY.WAV 28 Kb "I feel happy!"
  • HELL.WAV 10 Kb "Oh, bloody hell."
  • HERRING.WAV 76 Kb "You must cut down the mightiest tree in the forest with a herring!"
  • HOWKING.WAV 18 Kb "Well, how do you become king, then?"
  • ICKY.WAV 48 Kb "Ekki ekki ekki ekki pikang zoom-boing"
  • INTRMSN.WAV 29 Kb The theme from the intermission.
  • JC.WAV 17 Kb "Jesus Christ!"
  • KINGWHO.WAV 11 Kb "King of the who?"
  • KNIGHT.WAV 17 Kb "I'm invincible!"
  • KNIGHTS.WAV 36 Kb "We are the knights who say 'ni!'"
  • LOONEY.WAV 9 Kb "You're a looney."
  • MESSAGE.WAV 31 Kb "Message for you, sir."
  • MONKS.WAV 123 Kb The monks' chant. "Pie Iesu Domine. Dona Eis Requiem."
  • MUSTBE.WAV 65 Kb "Who's that, then?" "I don't know. Must be a king." "Why?" "He hasn't got shit all over him."
  • NEWT.WAV 60 Kb "Well, she turned me into a newt!" "A newt?" "I got better."
  • NI.WAV 6 Kb "Ni!"
  • NIBBLE.WAV 16 Kb "What's he do, nibble your bum?"
  • NONEPASS.WAV 21 Kb "None shall pass."
  • NOO.WAV 8 Kb "Noo!"
  • NOTDEAD.WAV 15 Kb "I'm not dead!"
  • 125.WAV 39 Kb "One, two, five!" "Three, sir." "Three!"
  • ORDINARY.WAV 21 Kb "That's no ordinary rabbit."
  • POINTY.WAV 53 Kb "Death awaits you all with nasty big pointy teeth."
  • PULL.WAV 13 Kb "Pull the other one!"
  • QUEST.WAV 62 Kb "Go and tell your master that we have been charged by God with a sacred quest."
  • QUITE.WAV 35 Kb "You know much that is hidden, o Tim." "Quite."
  • RAZ.WAV 42 Kb Frenchman razzing King Arthur.
  • REPRESS.WAV 21 Kb "Help! Help! I'm being repressed!"
  • ROGER.WAV 69 Kb "I am a shrubber. My name is Roger the Shrubber. I arrange, design and sell shrubberies."
  • RUNAWAY.WAV 32 Kb "Run away!"
  • SADTIMES.WAV 20 Kb "There is a pestilence upon this land."
  • SCRATCH.WAV 14 Kb "'Tis but a scratch."
  • SHRUB.WAV 30 Kb "A shrubbery!"
  • SHRUB2.WAV 31 Kb "Another shrubbery!"
  • SILLY.WAV 35 Kb "On second thought, let's not go to Camelot. It is a silly place."
  • SOD.WAV 19 Kb "You silly sod!"
  • SPANK.WAV 22 Kb "Yes, you must give us all a good spanking!"
  • SPLAT.WAV 9 Kb The prince falling out of the tower and hitting the ground.
  • STRANGE.WAV 16 Kb "What a strange person."
  • SWALLOW.WAV 29 Kb "What do you mean? An African or a European swallow?"
  • TART.WAV 64 Kb "You can't expect to wield supreme executive power just 'cause some watery tart threw a sword at you."
  • TAUNT.WAV 39 Kb "Now go away or I shall taunt you a second time."
  • TESTE.WAV 52 Kb "We fire arrows in the tops of your heads and make castanets out of your testacles already."
  • TIM.WAV 56 Kb "There are some who call me Tim."
  • TIMGRAIL.WAV 33 Kb "You seek the holy grrrailll."
  • VELOCITY.WAV 38 Kb "What is the airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow?"
  • VIOLENCE.WAV 23 Kb "Come and see the violence inherent in the system!"
  • WHOKILL.WAV 44 Kb "Let's not bicker and argue about who killed who."
  • WIPE.WAV 38 Kb "You tiny-brained wipers of other people's bottoms!"
  • WITCH.WAV 22 Kb "We have found a witch. May we burn her?"
  • WOUND.WAV 62 Kb "Look, you stupid bastard, you've got no arms left." "Yes, I have." "Look!" "It's just a flesh wound."